You might be a Fundy/Evangelical Christian or Mormon if...

10 — You vigorously deny the existence of thousands of gods claimed by other religions, but feel outraged when someone denies the existence of yours.

9 — You feel insulted and “dehumanized” when scientists say that man evolved from other life forms, but you have no problem with the biblical claim that we were created from dirt.

8 — You laugh at polytheists, but you have no problem believing in a Triune god.

7 — Your face turns purple when you hear of the “atrocities” attributed to Allah, but you don’t even flinch when hearing about how God/Yahweh/Jehovah etc. slaughtered all the babies of Egypt in “Exodus” and ordered the elimination of entire ethnic groups in “Joshua” including women, children, and even trees!

6 — You laugh at Hindu beliefs that deify humans, and Greek claims about gods sleeping with women, but you have no problem believing that your Holy Ghost/Spirit impregnated Mary, an unwed, who then gave birth to a man—god who was killed, came back to life and then ascended into the sky.

5 — You are willing to spend your life looking for little loopholes in the scientifically established age of Earth (4.54 billion years), but you find nothing wrong with believing dates recorded by Bronze Age tribesmen sitting in their tents and guessing that Earth is a few generations old.

4 — You believe that the entire population of this planet, with the exception of those who share your beliefs — though excluding those in all rival sects —  will spend eternity in your invented infinite Hell of lakes of fire and brimstone. And yet you consider your religion as most “tolerant” and “loving.”

3 — While modern science, geology, biology, physics and history, have failed to convince you otherwise, some idiot rolling around on the floor speaking in “tongues” may be all the evidence you need to “prove” Christianity.

2 — You define .000001% as a “high success rate” when it comes to answered prayers ― evidence that prayer works. Yet you think that the remaining 99.999999% FAILURE rate is simply the will of your god, an Invisible Man in the Sky.

1 — You actually know a great deal less than many atheists and agnostics do about your bible, your Christian religion and church history; but you still call yourself a Christian.