CHRISTIANITY’S DUEL PROPHECY

CHRISTIANITY’S DUEL PROPHECY

Yeshurun Kayemet

How does a Christian “dual prophecy” work?

1. It is created AFTER THE FACT.

2. The words do not need to have a direct bearing on both of the two matters it discusses.

3. The words do not need to mean the same thing for both statements. (So "almah" can mean "young woman" in one meaning, and supposedly mean "virgin" in another.)

4. It is impossible to prove or disprove because it can be twisted, er, I mean interpreted, to mean anything.

So here is an example:

In Genesis 49:3-4 you learn that Jacob blessed his sons, beginning with Reuben:

3 'Reuben, you are my firstborn, my strength and the beginning of my manhood, first in rank and first in power. 4 [But because you were] unstable as water, you will no longer be first. This is because you moved your father's bed, committing a profane act. He moved my bed!

Here is how to understand it under the treatment of the Christian "dual prophecy" principle.

49:3 'Jesus, (Reuben really means another name for Jesus), you are My (because this is G-d speaking, not Jacob) firstborn (Israel USED to be my firstborn, but now you are), my strength (you are how I express My strength on earth, and all miracles I have ever done I should have done through you, like the Splitting of the Reed Sea and the Ten Plagues, but I forgot and didn't do them that way) and the beginning of my manhood (G-dhood), first in rank (you smell the most) and first in power (which makes you invincible so neither the Sanhedrin nor Romans could ever kill you).

49:4 [But because you were] unstable as water (even your parents and family thought you were insane), you will no longer be first (this means, actually, that you will ALWAYS be first, but sinners shall consider you last). This is because you moved your father's bed (being born from an adulterous act, and thus you are illegitimate), committing a profane act (by overturning the Courtyard of the Holy Temple and by denigrating the Rabbis). He moved my bed (he claimed to displace even my children, Israel)!

Here is another example of how Jesus can be seen as foretold through the magic of "dual prophecy."

The Bible says: "Do not muzzle an ox when it is treading grain" (Deut. 25:4).

To muzzle involves placing something over the head of the ox. This refers to a crown of thorns. An ox refers to Jesus, of course. How do we know (though only a pharisee would ask that question)? Because Moses said about Joseph "His glory is like a first-born ox...." (Deut. 33:17) and whenever the Bible says "Joseph" it means Jesus, so therefore whenever it says ox it means Jesus (more about that later).

"Treading grain" means hard work, so this refers to Jesus (or should we call him oxke?) carrying the cross.

Thus, according to the Christians, the Bible is saying, by the magic of dual prophecy, that the Jews will sin by making Jesus wear a crown of thorns as he carries his cross. Of course, it wasn't the Jews did not do that, but this is Christian theology, which is not fact.

Now, if the word ox always means Jesus, let's see how that works in dual prophecies.

Let's examine Exodus 23:4 in the Christian’s dual prophecy mode.:

4 If you come across your enemy's ox or donkey going astray, bring it back to him.

"You" refers to Christians, of course.

"Your enemy" means the Jews.

"Ox" means Jesus.

"Donkey" also means Jesus. How do we know? Because Jacob blessed Issachar and said "Issachar is a strong-boned donkey..." (Genesis 49:14).

So that refers to Issachar, which means Jesus, because Moses said "Rejoice Zebulun in your excursions, and Issachar in your tent" (Deut. 33:18).

And a tent means Jesus, because it says "when a man dies in a tent," and Jesus died, so it must mean Jesus.

Thus, "donkey" refers to Jesus, by the magic of (heavily contrived) dual prophecy.

"Going astray" refers to backsliding heretics and Jews. They must be returned and brought back to their master, Jesus.

So again: the verse that says "If you come across your enemy's ox or donkey going astray, bring it back to him" really means, through dual idiocy:

So now, via the dual idiocy, eh make that dual prophecy, a Christian is charged―If you see a Jew who does not believe in Jesus, you must "bring him back."

Note to Pharisees: Never mind that this would mean that Jesus is the enemy of the Christian person charged with this mission. This is a dual prophecy, and words do not need to mean what they mean in a dual prophecy. Got that?

And never mind that you can't bring a Jew "back" to where he has never been, he was always owned by Jesus, he just never knew it! So go out there and win a few souls for your enemy! Or something like that....

I hope this helps clear up the matter of dual prophecy.

DISCLAIMER:

Citation of Hebrew scripture and sources in articles or analyses is not in any way an acceptance, approval or validation of the Jewish religion, its works or scriptures. The Hebrew bible, like the Christian New Testament, is fictitious -- from a 6-day creation of the universe; to cunning, walking, talking snakes; big fish tales; world flood and an "Invisible Friend in the Sky" it is all fiction, a bold sham perpetrated on the world.

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